LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!
We go straight into a hot opening with all the make professional dancers doing a professional dance. It's a Chippendales reunion? Jonathan Roberts is just too masculine... I am telling you.
Tonight is NIGHT ONE OF a THREE NIGHT PREMIERE and they are going to have to do two dances! Woooo hoooo... but we get to meet the stars of Season 9 as their parade of stars makes it down the stairs...
MEN'S NIGHT!!!!
Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnoff is up first. He's going to dance the Cha Cha Cha and is actually more charming than I thought he would be. His hair is totally spiky and he does a couple cool moves in his dance. He might be one of the people that i have to knock down right away because he has performing and dancing in his background. The ending seemed awkward. THe judges think he is full of potential and will be good later. His scores are 7, 8, 7 for a total of 22.
I'll say it. Carrie Ann Inaba's hair is atrocious... Ugh. She must have slept on it since she was hosting the TV Guide Red Carpet special the night before.
Chuck Liddell & Anna Trebunskaya are up second and the guy has tattoos on his head. I learn right away that he's a bad ass... but he is up against his match by meeting Anna who is a really tough teacher. He is rough... I get it. They are dancing the Foxtrot and the mohawk is covered with a top hat... You'll never guess how he dances... Stiff! The only saving grace is that he is obviously upset every single time he messes up. It wasn't good. Sorry Chuck. The judges thought it was good entertainment. Code for: Please don't kick my ass Chuck. His scores are 6, 5, 5 for a total of 16.
Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer is a longtime actor and a martial arts expert. He is very complimentary of Lacey who self describes himself as the Rebel of the Dance Floor. How much a rebel are you if you self describe yoruself that way? They are dancing the Cha Cha Cha to Everybody Is Kung Fu Fighting... uhhhhhh... The dance was perhaps a bit too gimmicky, but he is good and might go far. The judges were mostly positive. His scores are 7,7,7 for a total of 21.
Apparently.... this is the premiere season of the "Relay Dance." Tom explains it and TW and I are confused... perhaps they will explain later.
Ashley Hamilton & Edyta Sliwinska are up fourth and Ashley is a bad ass since he does a lot of dangerous stunts so his body is young but limited. Edyta feels confident and she looks wonderful... as always. It was a nice little dance where Ashley didn't have to do much. The judges agree that is was missing something... His scores are 5, 6, 4 for a total of 15.
Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson dance fifth and I am sad that Marie OSmond's brother is dancing with one of my favorites... Kym Johnson. Donny seems to be one of those people that asks questions and questions and he's embarrassed when they do intimate moves. Behold the power of the MORMONS! BEHOLD!!!!!!!!!! They are dancing the Foxtrot to All That Jazz. Great song and he has enough flair and charm to make me intially like him.... dammit. He's having fun and more. That could get infectious. The judges agree that his theaterics were better than his dancing. His scores are 7, 6, 7 for a total of 20.
Louie Vito & Chelsie Hightower are up sixth. He is a professional snowboarder who has never seen the show. Chelsie is small but tough... so we have two shorties who are strong willed. He's obviously a dufus with a lot of guts and no regard for safety, but he seems interesting. We'll see. His dance is the Foxtrot. The judges were rough but enjoyed it. His scores are 6, 7, 6 for a total of 20.
Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova are up seventh. She was the pro dance winner from last year and Michael Irvin is dancing because he wants to beat Jerry Rice. I am surprised that he is allowed to leave his home town. Isn't he still on parole? They are dancing the Cha Cha Cha. Jerry Rice got a 21... so Irvin just wants to get a 22. He thinks ballroom dancing is really hard. Duh... 8 seaons before you... and I picked that up my friend. It was smooth and seemed lifeless. Boring and full of holes. The judges hated it. His scores are 5, 4, 4 for a total of 13.
Tom Delay & Cheryl Burke are up last and before I even see or hear anything... I am glad to see that Cheryl won't win again since I turned on her last season. His nickname is "The Hammer." Tom is in better shape than I thought he would be. He is conservative... In case you didn't know that. Sooooo... the Cha Cha Cha is going to be tough for him. He is dancing to Wild Thing and almost falls down the steps. Interesting dance. It could have been worse. That's all I got........ seriously. The judges were... umm... ok with it? I can't quite tell... His scores are 6, 5, 5 for a total of 16.
Tomorrow night is the lovely women... and Joanna Krupa is looking phenomenal. Tom interviews most of them.
It's time for the relay dances... the 8 couples were split into 2 groups of 4. They will all dance the same dance. The judges will rank them 1-4. First gets 10 points, second gets 8, third gets 6, and fourth gets 4.
The first set of four pairs is dancing the Salsa. They are Chuck Liddell & Anna Trebunskaya, Louie Vito & Chelsie Hightower, Ashley Hamilton & Edyta Sliwinska, and Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson. We get a video package of all them practicing and talking shit to each other. It's funny and Louie Vito had the best line to Donny. "The only ghigh scores you are going to see are on your birthday card." The dances are completed and it seems that the judges liked Donny the best and he was the best...
The judges ranked them in this order:
1.Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson
2.Louie Vito & Chelsie Hightower
3.Chuck Liddell & Anna Trebunskaya
4.Ashley Hamilton & Edyta Sliwinska,
The second set of dancers are dancing the Viennese Waltz. The four pairs are Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnov, Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer, Tom Delay & Cheryl Burke, Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova. It's time to see the video package... and I smiled... uhhh... once. No one seems to really jump out at them... except maybe Mark.
The judges ranked them in this order:
1. Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnov
2. Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer
3. Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova
4. Tom Delay & Cheryl Burke
Scores... Just a reminder!
Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnov -- 22 + 10 = 32
Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson -- 20 + 10 = 30
Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer -- 21 + 8 = 29
Louie Vito & CHelsie Hightower -- 20 + 8 = 28
Chuck Liddell & Anna Trebunskaya -- 16 + 6 = 22
Tom Delay & Cheryl Burke -- 16 + 4 = 20
Ashley Hamilton & Edyta Sliwinska -- 15 + 4 = 19
Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova -- 13 + 6 = 19
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