Top Five Greatest Reasons To Run Naked Through the Streets
1. You too... can be just like Will Ferrel in Old School. The girls will flock!
2. You are in a bitter divorce battle and you need to show just cause as to what she has done to drive you completely insane.
3. People let you alone.
4. People are completely taken... aback... especially since it was a parade.
5. Graduation STREAKING!!!!
Top Five Things That You Never Want to Find in Your Basement
1. Water
2. Bodies
3. A case of unused beer.
4. Immigrants
5. Rodents
Top Five People That I Would Like To See on Next Year's 24
1. A dead Jack Bauer
2. Marilyn Manson as a terrorist
3. Regis Philbin as a criminal mastermind.
4. The Legion of Doom with Grod
5. Howard Stern as "The Flamingo"
Top Five Mother's Day Activities That Are Good For Convict Mothers
1. Baking a file cake.
2. Making C4 cupcakes.
3. Playing Conjucal Bingo
4. Anything that involves pillows and fighting with them.
5. Solitary solitaire.
Top Five Places To Store Extra Stuff -- No Really... Stuff Goes There...
1. In the corner in a huge pile.
2. In the attic.
3. Under the bed.
4. In the basement.
5. Under the dining room table.
Top Five Reasons Why I Should Renew My Subscription to Playboy
1. The articles
2. Those knee slappingly funny cartoons in the back.
3. To find the bunny on the cover... that is a blast.
4. Naked boobs.
5. The FREE gifts!!! (They aren't as good as those old Sports Illustrated football phones... but hey... why not!!?!?)
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
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