Monday, October 26, 2009

Dancing With the Stars -- Week 6

And so we remember what we were told last week and try to decipher what was said.

1. Double elimination this week.
2. There will be a dance off during the elimination episode.
3. Something else about a new dance during the dance off... Hrm.
4. If there is a double emilination... how many people will be dancing in the dance off?
5. My brain officially hurts and the night hasn't even begun yet.


They are dancing two dances tonight -- The Waltz and the Jitterbug (one each) and then the Dance Marathon (Mambo)! (Huh?) This is what they call the "Upping of the Stakes."

Mya & Dmitry Chaplin are up first and we are reminded that she was second last week after three weeks at the top of the leaderboard. They are dancing the Jitterbug and Mya is looking forward to having a lot of fun. Mya seems to have a hurt hip bone. Poor baby. So... she gets a massage to take care of her aches and pains... America sighs in complacency. "Float like a Jitterbug and sting like a bee." said with a goofy smile. God... she is truly boring. The dance starts and there is a lot of "messing about" with props and she finally gets into the dance. There are a lot of kicks and fun and she is good, but there seems to be a lot missing. Just a ton of the same thing over and over again. Len says that the last refuge of the untalented is the use of props... and he is disappointed she wasted so much time since she is so good. Bruno thought her timing was perfect. Carrie Ann agrees with Len and says that is was too soft and muted. Their scores are 8, 7, 9 for a score of 24.

Melissa Joan Hart & Mark Ballas show up second and we are reminded that last week was not her best. Again, she announces that she is ready to "step it up." Stilted and ... stilted... They are dancing the Waltz this week and her posture is atrocious so Mark brings in his mother. Of course... she's tough. TW doesn't like her and I was sort of middle of the road on her. I am officially in TW's camp now. It seems like a tragic start to the dance, but I can only see their faces. The rest of the dance just seems off balance to me. The crowd liked it a lot though. Bruno hated it and said "It wasn't good." He was rough. Carrie Ann agrees and called it a "sticky" dance. And Len is smoking pot who says that she was elegant and had musicality proving that he is on a different planet. Their scores are 7, 7, 6 for a total of 20.

The dance off is explained. The lowest score is booted... no matter what. The second and third lowest scores will dance a brand new dance for the judges to try to stay in the game. Weird and how do you plan for that? Also -- the judges have the sole discretion about who goes home. America has NO say in it. The contestants get to pick their dance and the songs.

Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer are up third. They are doing the Jitterbug. Lacey is choreographing a dance that will allow Mark to step up and shine. He is going to be doing all the tricks and jumps. Lacey takes him to a Jitterbug club to experience it all. This will be awesome or a train wreck. It starts awesomely and I liked a move where Lacey jumps onto his side and slides down. The role reversal works for me and he does do some great and energetic things. I get a strange feeling that the judges will think they are a bit too frenetic. Carrie Ann loved it. Len loved it. Bruno called it "truly spectacular." They all pointed out a slight loss of steps at the end of the dance which did occur. Their scores were 9, 9, 8 for a total of 26.

Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnoff dance fourth. God... will AMerica just vote out this whiny putz? He can't wait to do the Waltz because it really suits his personality. He gets to sit and wait through a commercial break to think about his dance first. It's called "icing." He finally gets to dance and his hair is quite spiky and messy. What did I learn from their Waltz? Karina is really good at spinning all around him AND I learned that Harold Wheeler can even ruin Once, Twice, Three Times a Lady. He was fine, but nothing tremendous to me. Len thought he was good and mature out there. Bruno and Carrie Ann pointed out his foot misteps. His scores were 8, 9, 8 for a total of 25.

Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova dance fifth and will he get out of the bottom of the leaderboard after being there three weeks in a row with his Waltz? Will he clench a nickel in his butt tonight? He knows that the reason he is still around is because of his fans and nothing to do with his dancing. We get to see a segment with him on his radio talk show... he finally practices his dancing. He gets very frustrated with his dancing. I watched the dance and my thoughts are -- Anna is pretty and might be a good dancer, but she isn't ready for this show since she isn't really choreographing him to anything special. The crowd likes it. Bruno said it was satisfactory, but not premiere league Waltz. Carrie Ann thought it was a charming Waltz and there was a lift. Len loved it. Someone is licking LSD. Their scores are 6, 8, 6 for a total of 20.

Kelly Osbourne & Louis Van Amstel hurt her foot last week and the pain continued past the show and was rushed to the hospital and cleared! They are dancing the Jitterbug this week and is having troubles with tricks because of her fear of heights. This is a theme. Louie is good at playing at the drama... so Kelly can overcome another "internal demon" to get the audience votes. Her outfit and makeup are pretty much like a clown, but when she starts dancing, the confidence and fun come out in spades. She isn't doing anything amazing, but it is far more fun than most of the others. However, towards the middle endish... there were a bunch of slip ups, but overall, it was funner than I expected. Ugh... I can't ever get it right. Carrie Ann basically tells her to stop thinking and stay happy. Len thought it was disappointing. Bruno thought it was cute and nice, but not with any sort of fire. Sell it chickadee. Her scores were 7, 6, 7 for a total of 20.

Louie Vito & Chelsie Hightower is up next and I forget the dude's name as I look at my new girlfriend Chelsie Hightower. They are doing the Jitterbug and Chelsie is trying to get him to do lots of tricks. He is feeling awkward about it and they watch his videos to do some comparisons. He comes out as a nerd and Chelsie quickly strips him of all thing nerd. THe dance starts and it is weird at best. I just don't think he is suited to dancing and it's a shame because Chelsie is so wonderful. Len liked parts of it... then hit him for his footwork. Bruno criticized it and Carrie Ann liked it even though he dropped her twice. Their scores were 7, 7, 7 for a total of 21.

Joanna Krupa & Derek Hough dance second to last after Derek has survived the flu. They are dancing the romantic Waltz and she thinks it is hard because it is so slow and controlled. They seem to be cracking because he doesn't think she is doing it right. I just don't know the Waltz so I won't say anything anymore about it. Tom calls it the "Get a Room Dance of the Season." Bruno loved it. Carrie Ann thought something strange was going on and thought it was hesitation. Len was critical of the footwork and happy they went straight into the dance and he thought it was the best Waltz of the night. Their scores are 8, 9, 9 for a 26.

Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson is up and wearing the WORST HAT EVER -- a train conductor hat that is five hundred pounds. They do some charity work and try really hard. The dance starts and it is incredibly high energy IMMEDIATELY. The hat matches the song. It is the most fun dance of the night... for sure. We should have known that his Jitterbug would be really high energy. The judges appreciated him more even if the dancing wasn't perfect. Their scores were 8, 8, 8 for a total of 24.

Competition Mambo -- Marathon!!!

It's time for the competition Mambo and they are going to be eliminated one by one and points will be given corresponding to the order they get booted. The video is to show us their training. The dance is a full four minutes.

The order of the boot was:

First (2) -- Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova
Second(3) -- Louie Vito & Chelsie Hightower
Third (4) -- Melissa Joan Hart & Mark Ballas
Fourth (5) -- Kelly Osbourne & Louis Van Amstel
Fifth (6) -- Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer
Sixth (7) -- Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson
Seventh (8) -- Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnoff
Eighth (9) -- Mya & Dmitry Chaplin
WINNER! (10) -- Joanna Krupa & Derek Hough

Scores... Just a reminder!

Joanna Krupa & Derek Hough -- 26 + 10 = 36
Aaron Carter & Karina Smirnoff -- 25 + 8 = 33
Mya & Dmitry Chaplin -- 24 + 9 = 33
Mark Dacascos & Lacey Schwimmer -- 26 + 6 = 32
Donny Osmond & Kym Johnson -- 24 + 7 = 31
Kelly Osbourne & Louis Van Amstel -- 20 + 5 = 25
Louie Vito & Chelsie Hightower -- 21 + 3 = 24
Melissa Joan Hart & Mark Ballas -- 20 + 4 = 24
Michael Irvin & Anna Demidova -- 20 + 2 = 22

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