Top Five Possible Ideas For Muh Birfday Bash
1. Football game with a charity shirt for kids with cancer.
2. BOCCE BALL TOURNEY!!!
3. Keg Stands tournament
4. Poker Tourney
5. Murder Mystery Dinner... but not a lame one... whoever dies has to take a hatchet to the head.
Top Five Reasons Why "Urine Power" Freaks Me Out
1. I have enough problems getting it into the toilet without missing.. how am I going to hit a battery?
2. If I pee on a power source... will I get shocked on the willy..as last I looked... liquid is a conductor.
3. I hate the smell of pee... imagine using a battery that smells of it.
4. I would have to touch the urine somehowe... ick.
5. Urinetown was a great musical... Urine power just sounds ... wrong.
Top Five States That Muh Wife is Flying Over Right Now
1. Idaho (The perfect name for a hooker potato.)
2. North Dakota (What a View!!!)
3. Montana (Hrm...militia anyone?)
4. Michigan (Next stop... wasted industries and gang violence...)
5. Minnesota (Is there really anything bad about Minnesota?)
Top Five Songs I Just Realized that I was Bopping Too
1. The Streak by Ray Stevens... umm... where the heck did that one come from?
2. So Long, Farewell from the Sound of Music soundtrack
3. Michael Jackson's The Man in the Mirror... I really got to take that chance.
4. Mandy... yes... I know... shit...
5. Everything by Kelly Clarkson... I really do like her stuff... dammit...
Top Five Things I Wasted My Life On This Past Weekend
1. The True Hollywood Story on Blossom... as much as I loved the show... I didn't need to see Mayim Bialik pushing 300 pounds.
2. It's So Over ( VH1 or E!) list of the top celebrity break ups.
3. Date My Mom -- This used to be in my guilty pleasures list... but now... it hurts my brain...especially after watching a clip of a mom pimping her gay son off.
4. Weeding... it never seems to stop growing. God bless the mulch though.
5. The Girls Next Door -- Ok ok... they are hot... extremely hot and they girate in ways I want to watch... but why... oh why... do I have to listen to them talk and think?
Top Five Things That Will Happen if Don Ho Dies
1. Hawaii will secede.
2. He will be buried in a vat of perpetual Tiny Bubbles.
3. Hawaii will have to find a new national hero. When we were there, we saw Don Ho references on all advertisements for entertainment.
4. Hawaii will change its official abbreviation from HI to HO.
5. They will petition the US government to name a hurrican after him.
5 comments:
Yeah Bocce Ball - I've got a set (cause what good italian doesn't).
g
I didn't see any of those states, as I was on an aisle seat, but thank you for looking out for me!
I feel that, in fairness to her, we should point out that Blossom is pregnant, which may account for her weight gain (although I do admit to being horrible and laughing at the Smelmooo's comment: "I know what happened to Six...Blossom ate her!"
I am sorry I missed the show on Blossom, I used to love it. Oh, and also, Six is on some show on UPN (the Parkers maybe?) with Mo'Nique. I hope I got the apostrophe in the right spot! Heh.
-Shari
Actually... Shari is wrong... Six lives in Blossom's tum tum.
2. If I pee on a power source... will I get shocked on the willy..as last I looked... liquid is a conductor.
Rest easy Mr. Smelmooo, the MYTHBUSTERS proved that peeing on the notorious 3rd rail will not get you electricuted. Each droplet breaks away from the "stream" and therefore no shock.
Post a Comment