Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Ultimate Battles of Good vs. Evil

Ultimate Battles of Good vs. Evil

I was a huge fan last year of Freddy vs. Jason. I love horror movies and those two are two of my favorite hackers of all time. I like Freddy because of his creativity and sense of humor and Jason because of his sheer resourcefulness and determination. It didn't surprise me that jason won in the end, but I am glad they left it open to another possible sequel. The monumental success of the movie enabled the studios to jump start other productions -- including the recently released Alien vs. Predator (AvP).

Although I have not seen it, Alien vs. Predator and the highly competitive Olympics have inspired me to come up with some more movie pairings or fights that I would like to see from the studios.

Ferris Bueller vs Parker Lewis -- Who would win in a fight between the smart mouthed Matthew Broderick from the movie or the lovable yet sly Corin Nemec from the television show? THe obvious answer is Ferris Bueller, but if you noticed, Ferris was pretty much a one man operation since he had his waste of a friend Cameron. Ferris' major weakness is that he would have to convince cameron everyday to help him out with his misadventures. Parker, on the other hand, had Mike who was always there. They were always on the ready. My view? Parker would win and it doesn't hurt that he has the big crazy kid who now plays Jerry on ER on his side. The guy shot a bazooka. Need I say more? Yes... the tide may turn if Zach Morris gets involved.

Buck Rogers vs. Flash Gordon -- I am insisting that it has to be the Gil Gerard incarnation of Buck Rogers from the "Buck Rogers of the 25th Century" show. The series that had Erin Gray in her tight grey outfit before she was on Silver Spoon as his sidekick. Flash Gordon of the 1920's might give him a run for his money but nothing tops Buck Rogers from the 70's... especially if he channels Hawk's superpowers. My view? Gil..I mean Buck kicks some ass.

Laverne & Shirley vs. Dee & Shirley -- I used to watch Laverne & Shirley all the time. I also used to watch What's Happenin' all the time as well. I would love to see an epic battle between the two female leads of each of these shows. Please note... if I threw in Mama in any of these pairings...she would win all by herself. Who would win a fight between two chicks from Milwuakee in the 1950's or two inner city girls from the 1970's in Los Angeles? Damn... this is easy... Maybe this wouldn't be that great of a fight... but it sure would be fun to watch Laverne be forced to funnel Pepsi and Milk through a garden hose. The only variable I see is if Little Earl stepped in to protect his girl allowing the scrappy Big Ragu to assist his Miss Kitty lover. My view? Dee tricks Laverne out of the L on her shirt as Shirley hey hey hey's Shirley to death.

Sweathogs vs Fat Albert Gang -- In all the years that I watched Welcome Back Kotter, I don't actually remember the Sweathogs getting into a fight on screen. I remember the episode where Barbarino didn't have a date to the dance when girls were asking the boys. All the girls thought he had a date so he ended up going with that really nerdy chick. That was evidence of his sensitive side but noting of fighting. Meanwhile, the Fat Albert Kids may not have fought while I listened to any of those tapes but they did play Buck Buck against other "gangs." Fat Albert always brought them to victory as he will in this epic battle as well. My view? Boom Boom Washington is the only real fighter here but is no match for Mush Mouth.

Peter Scolari vs Tom Hanks -- Bosom Buddies came out years ago and it was a moderate success until it Jumped the Shark and gave the pair their own advertising agency. Buffy vs. Hildegarde. Buffy went on to become a huge star and Hildegarde went on to play 18th fiddle on Bob Newhart's show -- Newhart. Forrest Gump vs. a guy lower than Larry, Darryl, and Darryl. My view? Peter Scolari kicks Tom Hank's ass. He has years of pent up aggression inside and is looking to lay the smackdown on Tom's candy ass.

If you have any insight into any of these, please post a comment. You can even post just to say hi and that you are from another country. Have a good one!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm with you on the Parker Lewis also because Mikey was much hotter than Cameron. He may have changed his stage name, but he's still Buddy from Just One of the Guys to me! I think that I would like to see Grape Ape vs. Jabber Jaw. I don't know who would win, I just think it would be funny.

-Shari