Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Musings From Our Weekend Miniature Golfing Jaunt - WIth some Surprise CLICKS!!!

Muh wife and I set out in the Big Blue Buick this past Friday for one of our "dates." Last week was pretty scarce in terms of "quality time" spent together as I had three night "events" and she had one.

We planned a night of goofy fun; and we had it. We started out by going to Pizzeria Uno in South Plainfield. We both had a hankering for crappy chain related food and we got it in spades at this restaurant. We also were treated to a cute waitress (I am not talking about Jessica Simpson in her new Dukes of Hazzard related music video cute but rather "a younger sister" cute.) writing her name in three or four colors on a cocktail napkin for us to read. It read "Shannon" and had swirls and pretty stars. I mused that she probably once worked at Macaroni Grill.

After stuffed from dinner, we headed over to play some miniature golf. It was an absolutely gorgeous night on Friday and playing miniature golf was an exceptional idea inspired by muh wife. At the golf course, I couldn't help but notice people and here are some of my observations.

1. Surprise Underpants -- There was a goofy foursome of young people two groups in front of us. The course had bottlenecks so we were exposed to them for about 1/2 of the holes. I would have to estimate that the people in the foursome were between 16 and 19 years old and they were obviously on a double date. One of the girls suffered from Pearitis.

Pearitis is where you have a woman that is shaped like a pair. Her bottom half is significantly out of portion with the top half of her body. Generally, women who suffer from this condition often wear tight jeans and resemble Grimace from McDonalds.

The girl wore her pre-requisite tight jeans and had to keep bending over to pick up her ball. As we were behind them I was exposed to something horrific each time. She was wearing a G-String. I have no problem with underpants being seen when people wear jeans and bend over. Pants can't always cover everything all the time. Things happen. However, when this girl bent over, her body moved and the jeans stayed putting exposing quite a bit of her G-String. The Grimace body suffering from Pearitis should not be wearing a G-String.

How are these comfortable and isn't she too young to be wearing that?

2. Nerdy Kid -- In front of the annoying foursome on a double date, there was a very young boy about 6 or 7 playing miniature golf with his Dad. Dad didn't have a wedding ring so the obvious guess is that this is the result of a divorce and little "Billy" is out on a play date with his father.

What got to me was that he was a cute "bespectacled" skinny kid who got excited about every ball he hit and ran to pick up his ball and help his dad by getting his. He was a nice kid who shared lots of facts with his dad and they genuinely seemed to be a nice pair. I heard the couple in front of us tease the kid by saying something close to "He is so nerdy. I bet he gets beat up a lot at school." This saddened me because I had just finished thinking that I was probably just like him as a kid... A kid with glasses and full of knowledge and wanting to share it with others. I never got beaten up though.

3. Final Results -- I kicked muh wife's ass.

The evening eventually ended and we went home... we ate ice cream and decided to watch Fargo when we got home. Tucker was also there. :)

Thanks to all the people that made the night a success.

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